Ask Your Counselor

Dr. Pallavi Rao Chaturvedi, a parenting coach, founder – Get Set Parent, and vice-president, Early Childhood Association of India, answers parents queries:

My three-year-old son speaks in short sentences of only three-four words. At three, he needs to be talking a lot more. Because of the intermittent lockdowns our social interaction with extended family and friends has been sparse. How do I get him to talk more?
— Deepa Maria, Mangalore
In the early years of development, children’s vocabulary, pronunciation and confidence levels vary according to their inherent capabilities and external environment. A three-year old also learns language skills at preschool — shut since the past 16 months because of the Covid-19 pandemic. This prolonged shut down of preschools may have adversely affected his language and speech development. Here are some suggestions to encourage your son to improve his language skills:
• Spend 30-45 minutes every day reading story books to him. This will enable him to build vocabulary and pronunciation skills.
• Engage in active conversations with your child, irrespective of language skills and vocabulary. Encourage him to respond to your questions in his own time and words.
• Recite nursery rhymes and practice songs together.
• Make an effort to organise play dates with peers in safe, open air spaces.
If you still feel there’s no improvement, consult a professional speech therapist.

My daughter’s school is about to reopen but she is hesitant to attend in-person classes because she has lot of incomplete homework and is worried about facing her teachers. She is in class VIII. How do I encourage her to return to school?
— Jisha Menon, Trivandrum
Schools countrywide have been closed for over 16 months and most children have mixed feelings about returning to in-school classes after such a long break. Parents and teachers need to support children with empathy and patience to re-adjust to normal schooling with Covid-19 safeguards such as masking and physical distancing. Here are some ways you can ease your daughter’s anxiety about returning to school:
• Talk positively about schools reopening and the many advantages of normative schooling such as in-person meetings with friends and teachers.
• Rework her daily schedule — including sleep, study, and eating routines — in preparation of school restarting.
• Sit her down and take stock of all pending homework assignments. Encourage her to complete it before school reopening day.
• Allay your daughter’s fears by talking to her class teacher and apprise her of the incomplete assignments.
• Counsel her gently that it’s okay to be behind in homework but more important to return to the school routine.
These are unprecedented pandemic times, and your daughter will benefit tremendously from your reassurances and understanding. Children are very resilient and quickly adapt to new routines.

My daughter loves playing basketball. She wants to become a professional player and is neglecting her studies. How do I make her aware of the importance of academics?
— Himanshi Shetty, Bangalore
You need to sit her down and draw an action plan for her future. She needs to understand the practise rigour and sacrifices that playing professional basketball requires as well as the opportunities and rewards. Similarly, highlight the advantages of academic success. Give her time to realise her strengths and accordingly choose her future path. Avoid imposing any kind of blanket bans, instead, work with her to plan a schedule that doesn’t compromise her studies and allows her time play and practice basketball. The two are not mutually exclusive.

(Dr. Pallavi Rao Chaturvedi is a parenting coach, founder – Get Set Parent, and vice-president, Early Childhood Association of India)

Also Read:Preparing children for in-school classes